5 posts tagged “me”
Christmas this year comes with a little guilt, and a lesson learned. Shopping for gifts for distant relatives has made me realize just how distant they are, and how out of touch with them I've grown.
Sadie and I bit the bullet last weekend and headed to the mall to shop for gifts. We're shopping primarily for our parents, brothers and sisters, and the associated in-laws. We wandered from one store to the next, bleary-eyed and empty handed. Nothing stood out. Nothing screamed "Buy Me! They'll love it!" After two hours we left the mall with one gift, and the feeling that it will be mediocre at best.
Everyone on our shopping lists is 800 miles away in Louisiana. This Christmas is the fourth since we've moved, and in this year we've seen our family the least since moving away. Our families have almost become strangers, and it's nobody's fault but our own. Without asking them for a list of things they want, scratching everyone off our list will prove difficult. Simply picking something off a list is so impersonal.
I'm unsure of what the solution for this year will be, but next year I'm going to attempt staying in touch more. I hope to go beyond email and Facebook too. I'm going to try phone calls, and letters. If it takes scheduling that time into iCal to do it regularly then that's what I'll do. I'm very anti-phone call. Talking to my mother once a week is a chore, but feeling this way about my family is worse. A few extra hours a month on the phone will be worth it if the next time a birthday or Christmas rolls around and I'll instinctively know what they want.
I miss these people, and I don't want the distance between us to loom so large. I want to buy gifts for dear friends and relatives, not strangers.
For the past few weeks I've been trying to cut back my caffeine intake for a variety of reasons. However since making that decision I've been consuming more caffeine than ever. It's a bit of self-sabotage I can't get a handle on.
Caffeine is a need for me. My brain is steeped in fog until that first cup of coffee. I'm not trying to go cold turkey. I do want to cut back though. For one thing it's a drug, and I'm addicted. I don't like the idea that a chemical, albeit a mild one, has dominance over me. Also I've read articles that suggest that caffeine intake can lead to stress that in turn causes weight gain.
Plus caffeine just makes me feel horrible once I've crossed that line into too much of the stuff. I get jittery, lose focus, and generally grumpy. So I need to cut back.
Caffeine intake often perpetuates many of the factors contributing to weight gain and continued obesity. Coffee and caffeine intake aggravates stress, including physical, mental, and emotional stress, leading to increased levels of the glucocorticoids including cortisol. A well documented relationship exists between chronically elevated levels of these stress hormones and deposition of excess fat in the abdomen leading to obesity as well as increased caloric intake, particularly increased ingestion of fats and sugars.
I keep telling myself I'll have one cup of coffee with breakfast, and maybe a Coke Zero with lunch. What actually happens is I end up having my morning cup at home, then brewing an entire pot at work and consuming it at a manic pace before lunch. At lunch I'll have my Coke Zero or more coffee followed on some days by an afternoon pot of coffee.
Gluttony is the word that comes to mind. I consume each cup in a daze, not entirely clear how many I've drank before, wishing my mug was empty so I can refill it for another round. It's self-sabotage at it's highest and I can't find the root cause.
Next week I'm ramping up my efforts. I have a pretty strong will in other cases. I manage to avoid fast-food and bakery goods in a workplace where they're as abundant as water. I know I can do the same with coffee.
But not in the good way you get from eating ribs, or, since I'm a white guy, drinking a box of wine.
Nope I've got bursitis. I haven't been officially diagnosed, it's more of an self diagnosis based on my symptoms and a little bit of web browsing.
Funny thing is I'm pretty sure it's from playing the Nintendo Wii. I'm a fairly active guy, I go to the gym, I lift weights, but I don't think I've made real "sports" motions with my arm since high school gym class. I'm paying for it now.
The pain isn't constant, but when it hurts, usually from small arm movements such as starting my car, it is excruciating. I'm limiting use of the am and medicating with Ibuprofen. That means I didn't buy WiiPlay last night because I knew I couldn't resist the temptation of playing it.
How have people mispronounced your name? How is it supposed to sound?
Submitted by Lorie.
My last name is Hebert. Say A-Bear (It's French, bitch.)
The most common mispronunciations are Herbert (rhymes with sherbet) and Hebbert (rhymes with dessert).
The only good thing I get out of this is I always know when it's someone who doesn't know me is on the phone, i.e. telemarketers.
My story "Terminal" is included in the Literary Cash anthology from the Smart Pop series of BenBella Books.
I really like this story, and the others included along side mine.
If you're a fan of the Man in Black consider picking up the book.
